Next Gen Dad

Escaping a Burning Building

2008-06-20T21:44:00.000-07:00

I posted last week that MyLove and I firmly believe that kids shouldn't prevent you from traveling. I seriously rethought that statement yesterday...the next few days of posts will cover our journey home.

We had an AWESOME week with the fam in Colorado. But the last three days of the trip were work, and being that things were not going well I was working on 4 to 5 hours of sleep. By the third day, yesterday, I was beat and finally had the opportunity to sleep in. At around 7:30 am Bubba hobbled over bleary eyed from the hotel pull out couch, got 2 inches from my face, and whispered loudly, "Dada, I gotta go pee pee."

"Well go pee pee then Bubba!" was all I could muster while opening one eye. Bubba headed half-way to the bathroom with that stiff legged gate that is characteristic of one thing...wet pants. He paused, turned around and walked back all wiggly. "Dada, I peeped (there is not an "e" missing from that word) in my bed."

"I'm so freakin' tired!" was all I could think, but I dragged my still asleep butt out of bed to change his pants. What I quickly realized was the stiff legged jittery walk was due to the fact he was holding the other half of his pee in after waking up half way into the act.

Let us take a moment to realize what a feat that is for a 3 year old. I can't remember the last time I had bodily fluid involuntarily escape while asleep (5 years ago), but I'm sure once it started there would be no stopping it. Next time you take a pee, stop the flow and try and walk around for 2 minutes without it bursting like Niagara Falls while you tremble uncontrollably hyperventilating.

I peeled his pee soaked pants, shirt, and underpants off only to watch his naked self pee for 2 minutes straight. I don't remember him drinking a keg of beer the night before, but I was really tired.

I pondered whether to go back to bed or put him in the shower. I opted for the shower since I was already up and didn't want to sit next to him on the plane smelling like a public bathroom at the beach.

To set the stage he was already pissed about being awake and peeing the bed, and did not want to take a shower with daddy. Normally he finds showering with me intriguing given all the similar body parts covered in hair. And let me say a man can never get enough of another man saying how much bigger your "parts" are, even if that other man is 3.

I wrestled him into the shower and was forced to hold him so to prevent him from scrambling out of the tub. As I completed a rather impressive one handed thick lather over his body, the fire alarm went off. And not the accidental steam from your shower in your room alarm. The deafening one that goes off when the entire building is in evacuation mode. I'm buck naked holding a greased-pig-slippery-sud-soaked toddler while half asleep trying to decide if this is the real deal or some glitch in the alarm system. After a quick mental flash of me attempting to escape a burning building while naked with naked boy in tow I decided to treat it like the real deal.

At this point Bubba is covering his ears and yelling, "Maaaake it stoooop daaadaaa!" while trying to rinse him off. I shut the water off and threw a towel around him and jumped out of the bathroom in my birthday suit while pushing him with hands still over his ears. I grabbed my clothes from the previous night while searching for my glasses.

I'm almost legally blind so me hopping around with one leg in my jeans squinting in the dark doing wide sweeping motions over the bathroom counter for my glasses I'm sure look hilarious at the time. Turning on the light escaped me as a good idea at the time.

Bubba was standing stark naked and wet turning circles in the middle of room towel at his feet with hands over his ears still yelling, "Maaaake it stoooop!"

I threw on Bubba's cloths while MyLove threw on some pants one-handed holding SweetPea in the other. I will say I took 30 seconds to grab my laptop bag and phone before pushing Bubba out the door. Judge me when you're in the position of loosing a decade of work history.

Because I have to try and be in control I also took 10 seconds to argue which would be the best direction for a stairway...and because I'm an idiot. MyLove barked at me, "There are stairways at both ends of the hallway, come on!"

Our exit into the parking lot was met with "Oh, she has a baby!" No hotel employees ushering us to safety. No distraught hotel guests begging to get back in to rescue their laptop. No fire engines racing to the scene ready to save the lives of dozens of trapped guests. I'm thinking the building is burning down and these people are ogling over the extreme cuteness of SweetPea.

They had it way more together than me who was sweating profusely from carrying Bubba down five flights of stairs and had phone in hand ready to text everyone in my address book to let them know we made it out okay...because I was sure our tiny hotel fire was being covered by CNN and all our friends who didn't know we were staying there would be worried.

Anyway, the hotel did not burn to the ground, but someone did burn some toast.

Stay tuned for part two of the travels home.

Flying, Magic Toilets, and Sherpa Training

2008-06-13T08:16:00.000-07:00

I've been in training for an event that was going to test me both physically, mentally, and parentally.

I spent endless hours doing laborious yard work (read about 8 hours over 4 days of which most likely had nothing to do with my prep but seems now to have made me slightly more physically resilient), overhead pressed Bubba during wraslin' matches, lifted baby carriers in and out of the car, and took mental notes of distraction techniques for for a 3 year old occasionally nicknamed "Whirlwind".

Quick side bar... The day after 4 hours of furiously whacking away at some dead grass that needed removing I was sure I must have whacked myself a few times...though maybe took a blow to the head in the process which is why I didn't remember hitting myself across the back with a shovel. That or I unwittingly and unknowingly disturbed the previously serene home of some yard gnomes who then took revenge by sneaking into my bed and beating my arms, legs, and back with their tiny shovels leaving me immobile and irritable.

Or it could be that wielding a pick-ax and shovel for 4 hours when the most regularly exercised part of my body is my phalanges fondling the keyboard of my Mac may have been better thought. I wonder what the actual age is when sporadic fits of strenuous exercise leave you regretting it the next day?

For me it is apparently 32.

Back to my story of preparation...

Hours of labor and meditation were logged building up to a singular event...

Travel.

MyLove and I are firm believers that kids should not mean you become home dwellers never leaving the confines of your city, unless it is to embark upon a torturous car ride where you stop every three hours to eat or pee. Man invented airplanes so we could fly, kids too.

Yesterday morning as the sun peaked it's way past the curtain my ears picked up the sound of, "DAAAADAAAA, IT"S LIGHT TIME!" I glanced at the clock to see it read 6:15. "Crap!", I thought. "My alarm isn't even supposed to go off for 15 minutes." I had been prepping Bubba for his airplane ride and he apparently was ready to fly.

The previous night had been spent packing up the car for the trip to the airport. We felt pretty good about our inventory as we had reduced essentials into 3 suit cases with a combined weight of only about 120 lbs...plus everything else.

3 Roller Suitcases - Check
Car Seat - Check
Car Seat Base - Check
Infant Carrier - Check
Stroller - Check
Laptop Bag (trip is half work, and even if it wasn't I have to have it) - Check
Backpack filled with snacks - Check
Backpack filled with activities - Check
Diaper Bag - Check

Curbside check at the tiny Oxnard Airport.
Translated to carry your own darn bags!

Flight #1
Our first flight was a puddle-jumper from Oxnard to Los Angeles (about 60 miles). These are great planes because if they crash you don't need a coffin because they are the same size. MyLove carried SweetPea onto the plane with Bubba in tow and I had our 4 carry-on bags and infant carrier while ducking low to keep from cracking my skull on the ceiling and weaving my way through the 18 inch aisle apologizing as I smacked each passenger on the shoulder and neck with our back-pack full of food. "Sorry! Oh, sorry about that! Excuse me. Ah, sorry!"

By the time I reached our seats I was a like jittery squirrel on crack as I tried to cram our belongings under the seats like nuts being forced into a too small whole. We were the last people on the plane but I was hurrying like the flight depended on my ability to quickly crush all Bubba's snacks and fold my MacBook in half.

Layover
We landed in LAX on time, only to find our flight to Denver was delayed by 1 hour, then another 30 minutes, then another 30 minutes. Thank Steve for creating the worlds greatest toddler distraction...the iPhone. I have Cars and Toy Story ready at all times. Screw productivity, just go buy one for your own sanity. Is your sanity worth $199...I thought so.

I am pretty adamant about Bubba not touching anything in public bathrooms for fear of him touching the mint in the urinal, then his mouth, then sticking his fingers in SweetPea's mouth. Upon completion of his first peepee trip Bubba turned to flush the toilet, but to only find as soon as he turned around it flushed itself. He turned to me and said, "It's a magic toilet dada!" I love that kid.

Flight #2
Being that my normally good sense went to pieces that morning I decided we didn't need to buy lunch at 12:15 pm before boarding the plane. Which didn't really bother MyLove because since I'm the greatest husband ever had upgraded her to first class, so she enjoyed bottomless Cokes and shrimp salad.

But as Bubba and I made our way to our seats it soon became apparent I had the luxury of putting my 6'4" frame into a middle seat directly in front of the bathroom...yep, last row on the plane. Nothing like the smell of poop mixed with that weird blue liquid at 30,000 feet.

To stifle the hunger pangs I ate one Cereal Bar, one handful of Craisins, a few bites of Panda Puffs cereal, and three pretzels from a Chex Mix. Brody ate everything I gave him, while making a gigantic crumbed mess in the process.

Bubba did great on the plane, thanks again to Steve. Cars and Sesame Street podcasts on a 17" screen. At one point we had a great conversation, and because everyone around us heard.

Bubba: Dada, you and me are boys.
Me: Yep.
Bubba: Because we have penises.
Me: Yes we do.
Bubba: But mama, sister, and RahRah are girls because they have baginas.
Me: Yes they do.
Bubba: It's like a penis but little and squished up inside em'.

The guy next to me got kinda fidgety at this conversation, which I thought was hilarious. I had have talked about body parts with Bubba the whole flight to see how uncomfortable he got.

Getting to the hotel
Thankfully when we arrived baggage claim all the luggage was already there, which really wasn't that surprising because after a bathroom stop, diaper changing stop, and short detour the wrong way I'm sure all the luggage going round and round with ours was from a different flight.

With dollar signs in his eyes one of those lurkers waiting to load your luggage before you can tell them not to silently approached us, to which I immediately waved him off....because I'd been training. MyLove wasn't sure about my ability to move everything in one trip, but I'd been training.

I had been training.

So I loaded up, and according to MyLove looking pretty silly slowly made my way through the airport to the rental car bus.

The family sherpa.

And as I type this I'm not sore...yet.

Love and Discipline

2008-06-11T14:57:00.000-07:00

The "Best NGD Dad" contest so far is no contest, and not because I already have 5 amazing stories. Rather because I don't have a single story.

I wait till the last minute to do everything, so maybe the rest of the bloggosphere's procrastinators will submit a story on Friday at 11:55 PM and the contest will actually go somewhere...leaving me to voraciously review submissions all day on Saturday.

But in honor of the contest I figured I'd submit a "Best NGD Dad" story to get the creative juices flowing for the rest of you. This one is about my dad. Obviously my story is not officially entered, but I'm hoping it creates some desire to honor a dad.

My dad fit the 'traditional' dad model. He did the man stuff like mow the yard, bring home the bacon, and have complete control over the TV remote and best viewing spot from the couch. His role in the parenting was rough housing, coaching any sport we played, helping with hard math homework, and disciplining. Things like diaper changing, house work, and nurturing were usually left to mom.

But one instance of my dad's rarely encountered nurturing side will forever be imprinted in my memory of what it means to be a great dad.

Me, Dad (Papa) and Bubba

(I wrote this story about 10 years ago in a college English course. My English Professor was a tough middle-aged Viet Nam vet that told me it was the first story from any student that made him cry...he was the dad of a 12 year old at the time.)

Here it is...

I have rarely considered my father an emotional person. He doesn’t really express his feelings outwardly, and my family has become used to this fact.

When I was about 11 or 12 years old, I began having a slight problem with authority. It seemed to me that I knew what was best for me and did not need parents or teachers “encouraging” me in what I should do. Needless to say, this behavior earned me a few groundings, a couple of swattings, and more then a few guilt trips. My parents felt that these things would straighten me out, and for good reason; the punishments always had in the past. But for reasons that I still cannot explain, they did not.

On one occasion which I was sent to my room, for something now which I don’t remember, my father came in and sat down, took off his belt, and told me to sit on my bed. To this day I don’t ever remember my father striking me with his belt, but he often enforced an idea which he entitled, “Proper Fear.”

My dad proceeded to sit down and talk to me about my actions and words that had hurt him and my mother. He then apologized to me for anything he had done that I felt was unfair, and with tears in his eyes he again said he was sorry and gave me his belt to spank him for what I thought he had done wrong.

I was broken inside, and instead of spanking him I crawled onto his lap and we both cried. I tell you this story because I have seen lots of 11 year old boys act the way I did, but have never seen or heard of a father act the way my father acted. My dad is one of my heros. I pray that one day I will be as good of a father and husband as my dad.

I lied it a little in my story when I wrote it. I do remember one thing I did.

My dad subscribed to Sports Illustrated, and I discovered the SI Swim Suit Issue as it arrived in the mail. With hormones versus common sense influencing my judgment I swiped it, took it to school, and proceeded to cut out pictures for me and my friends paste all over our Trapper Keepers. Twice dad asked me if I took it, and twice I said, "No."

When the call from Principal Cook came, my cover up of covering my notebook with women draped in skimpy cover ups was up.

The following day dad drove me to school and asked to meet with me and all of my friends privately. I was sure I would be the loneliest kid in school after that. When you get all your friends busted, notes sent home their parents, and then your dad wants to meet with all of them life as a pending junior higher is over.

Dad sat down with all of us and proceeded to all of our surprise apologize to us. He apologized for getting Sports Illustrated which led to the incident. He then told us though he loved reading SI he had canceled his subscription and would never renew it again.

That was about 20 years ago, and I've never seen an SI in my parents house since.

Thanks dad.

Basketball Diaries...or Baseball...or Soccer...any sport really

2008-06-10T21:52:00.000-07:00

I love sports, but not as much as I'd love to. In my single days I followed my teams (Broncos and Lakers). Broncos because I was born and partly raised in Denver (pass the Orange Crush anyone!?), and Lakers because the "Hey Moe" Nuggets just couldn't overcome who..."Show Time". And at the age of about 8 "Magic" was a really cool name.

Actually Magic is a cool name no matter what age you are.

I was never the guy from who's mouth flew fountains of fabulous facts like every player with the middle name Frank from the 1972 to 1977 MLB playoff teams. I had friends like that, but I instead filled my head with juicy gems like how much blood the human body has (about 6 quarts), why lightening actually strikes up instead of down, and how to geometrically calculate the number of jelly beans in the jar at the school fair. Yep, I was...err...am that guy.

The Lakers are still my team, I just know nothing about them anymore. And there it is, one of life's big changes for this NGD.

I used to watch sports, especially basketball. I could watch the same Sports Center three times in a row (still could...if we had ESPN). If I was in the car for a long drive I'd find a game on the radio.

Now instead of sports I watch Disney movies, Curious George, and Land Before Time. Whoever is making those movies should now stop...for God sakes stop! After "Land Before Time MCDXXVI: The Round Circle of Flying Light that Wiped Out Our Existence" I think I've had enough. And the sound track...hot poker meet ear drum....ah relief.

Instead of sports radio in the car we listen to Veggietales and The Music Machine.

But sometimes, though very rarely, Bubba climbs up on the couch and will watch sports with me. This is great for me because I can justify it as quality time with Bubba without feeling guilty when MyLove is trying to entertain SweetPea, do laundry, and get dinner ready whilst I get more out of shape by watching athletes whom I envy and get younger than me every year.

But those rare occasions we do partake in athletic tube-togetherness are some of my favorite as they allow me a momentary glimpse to what the future may be like. Me watching him play and us watching our favorite teams together. Cheering at their success and sharing in the disappointment of their defeat. Times when I get to explain the rules like my dad did with me.

I can't wait when most of my sport watching consists of a mashable mass of kids running after ball kicked in random directions, or an intense moment of fatherly fear as a hopping ground ball must become more interesting than the rocks at his feet, or when the pure excitement and adrenalin of touching the ball means shooting at any hoop even it is the wrong one. I can't wait.

Bubba, you don't have to love sports. But I hope you at least like sports. I know I will be disappointed if you don't, but I'll love you tons still. And I'll hope that SweetPea will be a bit of a tomboy.

Father's Day "Best NGD Dad" Contest!

2008-06-06T13:04:00.000-07:00

In honor of all dads fulfilling the calling to be a Next Gen Dad, NGD is hosting a "Best NGD Dad" contest. And here is the best part...there will be 5 winners!

The concept is easy, submit a compelling story by 11:59 PM on Friday, June 13th nominating who you think is a "Best NGD Dad" (there is an FAQ below). The 5 winners will have their story posted to NGD on Father's Day AND receive 11 great books courtesy of Hachette Book Group USA.

Living on the Black: Two Pitchers, Two Teams, One Season to Remember by John Feinstein. Read an excerpt here.
The Last Real Season by Mike Shropshire. Read an excerpt here.
Lone Survivor by Marcus Luttrell. Read an excerpt here. (Available in audio format)
A Tale of Two Subs by Jonathan McCullough. Watch the video or view photo gallery.
A Terrible Glory by James Donovan. Read an excerpt here.
The Training Ground by Martin Dugard. Read an excerpt here.
The Film Club by David Gilmour. Read an excerpt here.
The Whole Truth by David Baldacci. Read an excerpt here. (Available in audio format)
Child 44 by Tom Smith. Visit Child44book.com. Read a excerpt here. (Available in Audio format)
The Adventures of Slim & Howdy by Kix Brooks and Ronnie Dunn. Read an excerpt here.
The Dudes' Guide to Pregnancy by Bill Lloyd and Scott Finch.

FAQ's
Who can submit a story?
Anyone can submit a story, but the story must be a nomination for a dad.

What is a NGD?
For the complete description read this. The short version of a Next Generation Dad is one that believes and daily lives out that raising kids is an equal partnership and joint effort between a mom and dad — with the reasonable exception of birthing and breast feeding. (A special mention should also be made here to dads that raise kids on their own, as they truly are NGDs in every way).

What is a "compelling story"?
That is really subject to the reader, which in this case is me and MyLove. So in that case the story should evoke emotion (happy, happy-sad, funny, etc.) and describe why the dad you are nominating is the "Best NGD Dad".

How long should my "compelling story be"?
All submissions must be under 500 words, which is basically one page, double spaced, with 12 point font (high school flash back). All submissions over 500 words will be immediately disqualified, no matter how compelling. :P

What is the deadline?
All submissions must be received by 11:59 PM on Friday June 13, 2008.

Where should I send my nomination?
Email Me your nomination (nextgendads@gmail.com) with "Best NGD Dad" in the subject line. Please include the following information in the body of your email: Your Name, Email Address, Relationship to Nominee, and a link to your blog or website if you have one.

What happens if I win?
If you win I will notify you on June 14, 2008 and your story will be posted to this blog on Father's Day, June 15th. In addition you will be shipped all of the books above from Hachette Book Group USA. I will request your shipping address when I notify you that you won.

A special thanks to Hatchet Book Group USA for providing the prizes for this contest.

The Fine Print (literally)
If you submit a story you are releasing to me the right to publish your submitted story on Next Gen Dads at my discretion. You'll need to email me a follow-up request to not print your story if you wish to no longer have it published.

When I Grow Up

2008-06-03T21:43:00.001-07:00

I'm blessed to get to work from home. I highly recommend it for dads, as you get to experience your family at a much greater level. I also highly recommend being self-employed, but I save those pitches for another blog.

Bubba regularly asks me to play during the day while I'm working. I enjoy my work, but I'd rather play. But alas I have to work. The other day he hopped (literally) into my office (which doubles as the nursery) and we proceeded to have this conversation.

Bubba: Dada, want to play with me?
Me: Yes, but I can't right now. I'll play with you after nap?
Bubba: But why?
Me: Because I have to work Bubba.
Bubba: On your computew?
Me: Yes, on my computer.
Bubba: But why you have to work?
Me: Because I have to make money.
Bubba: But why you have to make money?
Me: So we can pay our bills and buy fun toys for you.
Bubba: Dada. When I get biggew, and biggew, and biggew, and biggew I'm gonna make money on your computew and then I can play with you.

I felt a tinge of guilt that I wasn't playing with him but also was so tickled that he kind of understood that fact that when he grew up he would work. And it felt great that the wanted to be like dad!

Bubba is a computer genius. Before he was 3 he could use both the touch pad and external mouse, and keeps himself fully entertained on PBS Kids for at least 15 minutes navigating around the games. I haven't taught him how to navigate to favorites for fear I'd have to buy him his own laptop.

Me and Bubba "Working"

Don't Stand In the Doorway

2008-06-03T21:08:00.000-07:00

*Updated on 6/4 with new info located at the bottom of the post*

I received an email forward today, and normally I don't read email forwards. But every now and then Karl Willig, one of my mentors, forwards me an email and they are generally worth reading.

I went to elementary school in Colorado and we had tornado drills regularly. The alarm would go off and I did exactly what I had been told to do for years....crawl under my desk. If I was at home the family would go the basement and crawl into the bathtub.

I now live in California's central coast and if someone asked me what to do during an earthquake I'd say, "Sit down in a doorway." (Assuming I couldn't get out of the house.) I asked MyLove what she was taught in school in TX and it was either crawl under her desk or sit next to the wall in the hallway. For an earthquake she said sit in the doorway.

The email forward was an article by Doug Copp of the American Rescue Team and it negates everything about disaster survival I have heard or been taught. I've pasted the article below but you can also read it here or watch the videos here.

To all you dads, you need to read this and then teach it to your kids and your kid's friends. Forward this message to every parent you know. Ask your kids what they get taught in school and pass this message to every teacher you know.

EXTRACT FROM DOUG COPP'S ARTICLE ON:
THE 'TRIANGLE OF LIFE'

My name is Doug Copp. I am the Rescue Chief and Disaster Manager of the American Rescue Team International (ARTI), the world's most experienced rescue team. The information in this article will save lives in an earthquake.

I have crawled inside 875 collapsed buildings, worked with rescue teams from 60 countries, founded rescue teams in several countries, and I am a member of many rescue teams from many countries.

I was the United Nations expert in Disaster Mitigation for two years. I have worked at every major disaster in the world since 1985, except for simultaneous disasters.

The first building I ever crawled inside of was a school in Mexico City during the 1985 earthquake. Every child was under its desk was crushed to the thickness of their bones. They could have survived by lying down next to their desks in the aisles. It was obscene, unnecessary and I wondered why the children were not in the aisles. I didn't, at the time, know that the children were told to hide under something.

Simply stated, when buildings collapse, the weight of the ceilings falling upon the objects or furniture inside crushes these objects, leaving a space or void next to them. This space is what I call the 'triangle of life'. The larger the object, the stronger, the less it will compact. The less the object compacts, the larger the void, the greater the probability that the person who is using this void for safety will not be injured. The next time you watch collapsed buildings, on television, count the 'triangles' you see formed. They are everywhere. It is the most common shape, you will see, in a collapsed building.

TIPS FOR EARTHQUAKE SAFETY

1) Most everyone who simply 'ducks and covers' WHEN BUILDINGS COLLAPSE are crushed to death. People who get under objects, like desks or cars, are crushed.

2) Cats, dogs and babies often naturally curl up in the fetal position. You should too in an earthquake. It is a natural safety/survival instinct. You can survive in a smaller void. Get next to an object, next to a sofa, next to a large bulky object that will compress slightly but leave a void next to it.

3) Wooden buildings are the safest type of construction to be in during an earthquake. Wood is flexible and moves with the force of the earthquake. If the wooden building does collapse, large survival voids are created. Also, the wooden building has less concentrated, crushing weight. Brick buildings will break into individual bricks. Bricks will cause many injuries but less squashed bodies than concrete slabs.

4) If you are in bed during the night and an earthquake occurs, simply roll off the bed. A safe void will exist around the bed. Hotels can achieve a much greater survival rate in earthquakes, simply by posting a sign on The back of the door of every room telling occupants to lie down on the floor, next to the bottom of the bed during an earthquake.

5) If an earthquake happens and you cannot easily escape by getting out the door or window, then lie down and curl up in the fetal position next to a sofa, or large chair.

6) Most everyone who gets under a doorway when buildings collapse is killed. How? If you stand under a doorway and the doorjamb falls forward or backward you will be crushed by the ceiling above. If the door jam falls sideways you will be cut in half by the doorway. In either case, you will be killed!

7) Never go to the stairs. The stairs have a different 'moment of frequency' (they swing separately from the main part of the building). The stairs and remainder of the building continuously bump into each other until structural failure of the stairs takes place. The people who get on stairs before they fail are chopped up by the stair treads - horribly mutilated. Even if the building doesn't collapse, stay away from the stairs. The stairs are a likely part of the building to be damaged. Even if the stairs are not

collapsed by the earthquake, they may collapse later when overloaded by fleeing people. They should always be checked for safety, even when the rest of the building is not damaged.

8) Get Near the Outer Walls Of Buildings Or Outside Of Them If Possible - It is much better to be near the outside of the building rather than the interior. The farther inside you are from the outside perimeter of the building the greater the probability that your escape route will be blocked.

9) People inside of their vehicles are crushed when the road above falls in an earthquake and crushes their vehicles; which is exactly what happened with the slabs between the decks of the Nimitz Freeway. The victims of the San Francisco earthquake all stayed inside of their vehicles. They were all killed. They could have easily survived by getting out and sitting or lying next to their vehicles. Everyone killed would have survived if they had been able to get out of their cars and sit or lie next to them. All the
crushed cars had voids 3 feet high next to them, except for the cars that had columns fall directly across them.

10) I discovered, while crawling inside of collapsed newspaper offices and other offices with a lot of paper, that paper does not compact. Large voids are found surrounding stacks of paper.

Spread the word and save someone's life... The Entire world is experiencing natural calamities so be prepared!

'We are but angels with one wing, it takes two to fly'

In 1996 we made a film, which proved my survival methodology to be correct. The Turkish Federal Government, City of Istanbul , University of Istanbul Case Productions and ARTI cooperated to film this practical, scientific test. We collapsed a school and a home with 20 mannequins inside. Ten mannequins did 'duck and cover,' and ten mannequins I used in my 'triangle of life' survival method. After the simulated earthquake collapse we crawled through the rubble and entered the building to film and document the results. The film, in which I practiced my survival techniques under directly observable, scientific conditions , relevant to building collapse, showed there would have been zero percent survival for those doing duck and cover.

There would likely have been 100 percent survivability for people using my method of the 'triangle of life.' This film has been seen by millions of viewers on television in Turkey and the rest of Europe , and it was seen in the USA , Canada and Latin America on the TV program Real TV.

*I received a comment from Maria Petal of Risk RED that the above information has some flaws. Read here some counter arguements to the above article.

Toddlers and Toilets

2008-05-29T13:43:00.001-07:00

We were enjoying a nice family lunch on the patio about 1 hour ago when Bubba announced he had to go peep (I'm not sure when he started leaving off the last "ee"). Our goal recently has been to instill in him the confidence that he can do it "by himself" versus with a parental helper - which is really for our own sanity as chaperoned bathroom trips inevitably turn into a drawn out ordeal with talking toys and delayed peepees or poops.

The conversation always ends up something like this.

Bubba: You be Chick Hicks dada. I'll be Doc Hudson.
Me: Did you go pee pee yet Bubba?
Bubba: Nope.
Bubba: You be the dinosaur dada!

I'll be good for the rest of my life if I never have to make Chick Hicks (or any other prop) look at a poop in the toilet and pretend how bad it smells...which I suppose is really my fault for ever doing it in the first place. That is the reason for encouraging solo bathroom trips..but back to the story.

Bubba trotted into the house and was gone for a duration that apparently sets off the Mommy Alarm because MyLove said, "Can you go check on him." (I think the Mommy Alarm is more attuned that the Daddy Alarm for reasons that were proved in this incident.)

I walked into the house and hollered, "You okay Bubba?" To which he responded, "Yes." I turned the corner into the bathroom to see Bubba standing next to the toilet with shorts and underpants around his ankles with one of those looks that says I-might-have-done-something-wrong-but-I'm-not-sure-and-sure-not- going-to-say-anything.

I took an initial assessment and all looked good. "Are you done?", I asked. "Yep." I then took a second look a noticed a consistent stream of water flowing out from under the closed toilet lid onto the floor, and an extra long tail of toilet paper hanging from the roll.

Me: Didyouputalotoftoiletpaperdownthetoilet?
Bubba: Yup.

The next 10 minutes were a blur of me YELLING for Chrystal to get me some towels and a bucket, me frantically soaking about 15 towels and two bath mats while attempting to stop the flowing water. All ended well and the bathroom floor is now freshly hand mopped with toilet water!

Our first toddler takes on the toilet. Mark up a W for the toddler.

Thanks to Say No To Crack for the great image.

Date Morning and Prince Caspian

2008-05-10T22:21:00.000-07:00

MyLove and I often talk about implementing "Date Night" but have never been very good at following through with it. We did however today have a wonderful "Date Morning"! Aunt RahRah took Bubba to breakfast and friend from home group watched SweatPea.

Westmont College, my alma mater, hosted a private viewing of Prince Caspian. Westmont got this privledge for a two reasons. 1) There is a Westmont alumni that works at Disney and 2) Westmont owns what is believed to be the wardrobe that was owned by C.S. Lewis (cool huh!)...click here for more details on this.

The movie editing was finished on Monday this week! There was a private showing in New York City this week and we were the second group in the world to the see the movie. How cool is that?! The movie is released to the theaters on Friday next week.

The movie is awesome and it made me want to read the books again. When it comes out you should go see it!

An Amazing Kid Young Man

2008-05-05T10:10:00.000-07:00

I think stories of suffering or struggle or overcoming obstacles about kids are more heart wrenching and emotional when you have kids. I know this is true for MyLove who before having Bubba and SweetPea did not cry much, but now regularly weeps with the most genuine tears at stories of sick, impoverished or neglected children. Her sweet heart just cannot take seeing it, and it is one of the many things I love about her (I don't understand why she purposefully watches it knowing she will cry though).

One of my very best friends, Andy, sent a heart wrenching and inspiring story to me this morning.

As I sat on the bed reading my soul ached for this young man and his family. The insignificance of my own accomplishments became apparent and I felt the smallest amount of pressure could push me to the floor as my body and soul shed tears for a young man who's body is riddled with cancer but who's peaceful spirit is filled with the grace of God. The article is written by reporter Mike White from the local paper, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. I encourage you to take the time to read the entire article. The story will make you sad but I hope will also give you hope. This young man (as his words are not that of a boy) is a witness and testament to faith in God and freedom over of the fear and bondage of death.

I pray every day that Bubba and SweetPea continue to be healthy and grow up without significant pain and suffering. But more than that I pray they grow up to have the relationship with God, maturity in faith, compassion for others, and vigor for life that John Challis has.

You can read the original article here but I've also included it below.

Teen is running out of innings, but the game still isn't over

A TALE OF COURAGE

Sunday, May 04, 2008

By Mike White, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

Photo by Matt Freed/Post-Gazette

The 18-year-old kid dying of cancer gets his wish, a chance to swing a bat maybe one last time in a real baseball game.

He hasn't played in a few years, but he's called on to pinch-hit. His eyes light up at the first pitch and he puts all of his 5-foot-5, 93-pound frame into one mighty swing, making contact and sending a line drive into right field for a single -- if he can reach first base. The cancer he's been battling for almost two years has spread to his pelvis, making running nearly impossible.

The kid worries about falling as he hustles down the first-base line. When he gets to the base, he lets out with a yell. "I did it! I did it!"

Safe at first with a hit and an RBI, the kid is hugged by a crying first-base coach. The opposing pitcher takes off his glove, starts applauding and his teammates follow suit. The kid's teammates run onto the field to celebrate.

It sounds like the climax to a heart-tugger movie. But there was no producer or film crew at the game between Freedom and Aliquippa high schools two weeks ago. The scene was as real as the tumors in John Challis' liver and lungs.

John is a kid with cancer, a senior at Freedom in Beaver County who was told a few weeks ago by doctors that cancer was winning and it was close to the end. The disease that started in his liver was now taking over his lungs.

"They said it could be only two months," he said, fighting back tears.

He paused before his seemingly never-ending optimism came through again.

"I told my mom I still think I can get two more years."

But his story isn't about dying. It's about inspiring.

His story, words, actions, beliefs and courage have become known around Freedom and surrounding areas in Beaver County, bringing people together from other communities and other schools.

Three weeks ago, Freedom baseball coach Steve Wetzel organized "Walk For A Champion" on Freedom High's school grounds. The purpose of the walk-a-thon was to raise money for one of John's wishes -- a last vacation with his mom, dad and 14-year-old sister, Alexis.

More than 500 people took part, including baseball teams from eight Beaver County high schools and members of Center High School's football team. John also used to play football at Freedom.

Mr. Wetzel, who calls the teen his hero, hoped to raise $6,000. That total was easily surpassed "and people are still calling with donations," he said.

The family has booked a cruise for June.

The Challis effect
A Beaver County church had planned a fundraiser, but John and his family asked the church instead to conduct the event and give the money to a fifth-grade boy in Beaver County who has a brain tumor.

"His family can use it more than we can," John said. "That's just common sense. Someone does something good for you, then you help someone else."

Actions and statements like those are what has inspired so many others. All of Aliquippa's baseball players wear John's jersey number "11" on their hats. At the walk-a-thon, Aliquippa star athlete Jonathan Baldwin, a Pitt football recruit, presented him with a ball signed by Pitt players.

After the walk, John addressed the crowd.

"He spoke from his heart," Mr. Wetzel, the coach, said. "He said, 'I've got two options. I know I'm going to die, so I can either sit at home and feel sorry, or I could spread my message to everybody to live life to the fullest and help those in need.' After hearing that, I don't know if there were many people not crying."

Last Thursday, Beaver pitcher Manny Cutlip tossed a three-hitter against Freedom as John watched in street clothes. After the game, every Beaver player came up to him and shook his hand. Some hugged him and some said they were praying for him. Manny Cutlip asked Mr. Wetzel if he could go to lunch some time with John. It happened the next day.

"I don't know what to say. I just wanted to get to know him better and see if I could learn anything from him to help me in my life," said the young pitcher, an imposing 6-foot-3, 225-pound standout athlete who will play football at IUP.

At lunch, he gave John a new football with a handwritten personal message on it. Part of the message read, "You have touched my heart and I will always look up to you as my role model."

Talk to John and you'll laugh at his sense of humor when he says things such as, "You can't let girls know that you know how to text message because they won't leave you alone."

But listen to his mature views on life and his philosophies ... and you might cry.

"I used to be afraid, but I'm not afraid of dying now, if that's what you want to know," he said. "Because life ain't about how many breaths you take. It's what you do with those breaths."

Figuring it out
It's been almost two years since John found out about his cancer. He knows the date like a birthday. June 23, 2006.

He discovered only recently that doctors didn't expect him to last through that first summer. "To me, that's already an accomplishment," he said.

In the first few months after the cancer discovery, John's father, Scott, would get up in the middle of the night, peek into his son's bedroom and see him wide awake, staring at the ceiling.

"He would just be thinking," the elder Challis said. "He's always been one who had to try and find an answer for everything. He wants to figure things out."

Through his own thoughts and through his deep Catholic beliefs, John believes he has "figured it out." He answers questions with maturity, courage and dignity, traits that have become his trademarks.

John requested that his mother, Regina, not be interviewed for this story because it will be too hard for her. He talks to his father about what to do after he dies.

"I sit up with him at night until 1 or 2 in the morning," Scott Challis said. "He'll tell me, 'Dad, when I'm gone, you have to do this or that. You have to watch your weight.' He's worried about my weight. He tells me I have to take care of mom.

"When the doctors told him a few weeks ago about how the cancer was winning, he had a lot of questions about what it was going to be like and about being comfortable. Later on, he broke down with me and you know what he did? He apologized. He was upset because he felt like he was letting everyone down who had been praying for him."

Scott Challis has found talking about his son makes the situation easier to deal with. But many people like to talk about John. Shawn Lehocky is a senior and one of Freedom's top athletes. For every football and baseball game, he wears a red wrist band with John's No. 11 on it.

"It seems like everyone in this community knows who he is now and he really has brought so many people together," Shawn said. "He's always on my mind. To see him and what he's going through, I don't know if I could act like that. He said some pretty strong words at that walk-a-thon that you don't hear 17- or 18-year-olds say every day."

John fought back tears a few times during last week's interview.

"Sometimes I cry, but people cry for all different kinds of reasons," he said. "Sometimes I just want to know why, but I think I figured that out. God wanted me to get sick because he knew I was strong enough to handle it. I'm spreading His word and my message. By doing that, I'm doing what God put me here to do.

"It took me about a half year to figure all that out. Now, when I'm able to truly believe it, it makes it easier on me. And when you know other people support what you're thinking, it makes it easier."

When asked where he gained his wisdom, he answered, "Through cancer."

"They say it takes a special person to realize this kind of stuff," he said. "I don't know if I'm special, but it wasn't hard for me. It's just my mind-set. A situation is what you make of it. Not what it makes of you."

He regularly wears his Freedom baseball hat. Under the bill of the cap is his name, plus this line: "COURAGE + BELIEVE = LIFE."

"I guess I can see why people see me as an inspiration," he said. "But why do people think it's so hard to see things the way I do? All I'm doing is making the best of a situation."

John then raises his voice.

"Why can't people just see the best in things? It gets you so much further in life. It's always negative this and negative that. That's all you see and hear."

John tries to keep complaining to a minimum, but he acknowledges his moments of crying.

"If I'm mad at anything in this, it's that I'm not going to be able to have a son, I'm not going to be able to get married and have my own house," he said, fighting back tears again. "Those are the things I'm mad about. But not dying."

The role of sports
John loves sports. He is an avid hunter -- "got three buck and two doe in the last year," he said.

He played baseball through Pony League and always loved football, despite his small stature. As a sophomore, he started on Freedom's junior varsity team as a slotback and cornerback.

"I was 108 pounds. I had to be the smallest player in the WPIAL," he said with a laugh.

The cancer forced him to stop playing football as a junior.

"But I will never forget," his father said, "when he first got sick he told me, 'Dad, I have to dress for a football game one more time.' "

He got his wish in the final game of his senior season, against Hickory. Coaches let him kick off once. He was supposed to kick and immediately run off the field to avoid danger. Instead, he stayed on the field and got a little excited when the kick returner started heading his way before being tackled.

Later in the game, the coaches put him in for two plays at receiver. Mr. Wetzel and others who saw the game proudly tell how, on one play, John tried to block a defender, fell down, but got up and pushed another defender.

Mr. Wetzel said seeing John play in that last football game, doesn't compare to seeing his hit against Aliquippa in that April 14 baseball game. John vividly remembers the details leading up to the hit. When he walked into the batter's box, he saw Aliquippa's catcher wearing a protective mask with the initials "J.C." and the number "11."

"I just looked at him and said, 'Nice mask.' "

He then noticed an Aliquippa coach saying something to the pitcher.

"I'm thinking, 'If they're going to walk me or throw easy to me, I don't want it handed to me,' " he said. "But sure enough, he threw me a fastball. That's what made it so good. ... There were only about 20 people there watching, but everyone was cheering."

Mr. Wetzel said: "We made it to the state [PIAA] playoffs two years ago and I thought that was the best feeling. I got to play in WPIAL championships at Blackhawk as a player. But that day, that hit, that moment ... That was the best feeling I've ever had in sports."

Six days later, Freedom played a game at PNC Park. John attended the game, but had an IV line in his arm for a treatment he was getting. He took out the IV line and asked Mr. Wetzel if he could pinch-hit again.

"Unbelievable. He told me the doctor said he could take it out for up to seven hours," Mr. Wetzel said. "He told me he just wanted to be a normal kid one more time."

So Mr. Wetzel let him pinch-hit. This time he struck out.

They have a unique coach-player relationship. Mr. Wetzel invited John to be part of the team a year ago and John calls the coach one of his best friends. They talk every day, at least on a cell phone, and go to lunch together once a week.

"The kid has changed my life," Mr. Wetzel said. "I cry for him just about every day. I'm 32 and I'm getting married in September. You know what he told me the other day? He told me to save him a seat in the front row of the church, because even if he's not there, he'll be there in spirit.

"He just keeps doing things and saying things that are just unbelievable. I know our team will never forget this season because of Johnny."

The two want to start a foundation in John's name for young cancer patients.

"Even if [the foundation] is something that can help only one kid or one family, to see people in a different way like I have, it will be worth it," John said. "Maybe it will help younger people who haven't gotten to see the finer things in life that I got to see."

John plans to attend Freedom's prom May 9 and plans to graduate in June. As John ended this interview, he said he wondered how his story will come out in the newspaper.

"When you write this, don't overthink things," he said. "I've learned that. There are a lot of unanswered questions in this world and the reason they're unanswered is because if you think about them too much, you're always going to come up with different answers. So don't confuse yourself and think about this too much."

First published on May 4, 2008 at 12:00 am

Product Review: Child Bike Seat

2008-05-01T09:59:00.000-07:00

Ever wonder why kids are forced to look at your butt when trying to enjoy a bike ride together? Rather than enjoying the wind in their face they get to enjoy your occasional wind in their face (pee-u).

I have wonderful memories of riding in a child seat on the back of my dad's bike where I suffered semi-regular high kicks to the side of my head if I didn't duck low enough as he swung his 6'2" 225 pound frame over the seat while mounting his 10-speed. (A helmet back then would have actually served dual purposes for me now that I reflect on it.)

I wanted Bubba to have those same memories with me (the bike rides not the head kicks). My main requirement was it had to be a front mount seat versus over the back wheel. I spent the evening hours reading reviews on epinion.com, babycenter.com, and parents.com. I traveled to the local sporting goods stores and specialty bike shops to touch, see, and evaluate any seat that was available to me. I questioned other parent-child riders to give me the opinion of their purchase.

Ultimately I discovered three things. 1) There are a limited selection of front mount seats 2) Front mount seats have a lower weight capacity and 3) They are really expensive.

One night towards the end of my research period I happened upon the ibert, inc. Safe-T-Seat. After reading all the reviews and seeing all the pictures I knew I had found my seat. We've had the seat now for over a year and have been 100% happy with the functionality, comfort, and company. When Bubba and I ride down-town I am constantly asked where I got the seat.One of my favorite things about the seat is that your child is centered perfectly over the bike's center of gravity so starts, stops, and turns are a breeze. I also like that I can squeeze Bubba between my fore arms if I have to stop fast.

Customer service at ibert is also beyond any expectation I could have. When they released a gel pad for the seat they sent it to me for free. Recently the cross-bar latch on the seat broke (I'm still not sure how). I emailed ibert and had a new cross at my front door within the week, no questions asked.

Pros: price, comfort, ease of balance, customer support
Cons: weight limit, child's access to brake and/or gears

Price: $79.99 (at Amazon.com)
Shipping: Free with Super Saver Shipping

You can buy the seat here and here and here (me and Bubba made the ebay listing!)
Click here for benefits of the seat.
Click here for Safety Tips.

Other seats I reviewed: WeeRide Kangaroo and Bike-Tutor.

Me and Bubba out for a ride

P.S We found a matching green Specialized bike helmet at our local bike shop.

No Cuts, No Buts, No Coconuts!

2008-04-29T09:27:00.000-07:00

I took Bubba to the fair Saturday evening and while in line to ride "The Bump Cars" (Bubba's reference to the crash-up-derby ride which I thought should be called Shatter Dad's Kneecaps) found myself getting further and further from the entrance to the ride. After the third parent with three kids in tow apparently related to the mother with two kids in front of me cut in line I decided I wasn't going to take the injustice to Bubba and politely tapped the teenage girl with toddler in front of me (hoping it was a brother or cousin) an said,

"If you would like to ride this ride you can wait like everyone else. My son and I have been waiting patiently here and you can do the same at the end of the line. If you have a problem with this we can call over the fair authorities whom I'm sure will tell you that cutting in line is not good fair etiquette. Your other option is for me to create a huge scene about how you are rude and inconsiderate of other people's children and should be publicly ridiculed for teaching all the children in this line that it is acceptable to NOT wait your turn!"

When I finished my lecture all the agreeing parents hollered, "Yeah" and shot me looks that said, "Thank You!" and "Way to tell 'em!"

That is exactly how it went in my head...

Outside of my head I just gave the teenage girl a typical disapproving dad look (the if-I-was-your-dad-I'd-be-making-you-apologize-for-that), to which she nervously turned forward and stopped the little boy she was with from kicking dirt on my shoes.

If the in-my-head tirade had been out of head I was pretty confident I was going to find myself fending off 80% of the fair goers since they all seemed to be related and there with each other. Every freakin' line we waited in kept getting longer from the front! Each time the ride operator would start letting a new group on the ride a crowd of parents and kids would join one of the parents in front of me shoving their kids through the gate inevitably filling the entire ride making Bubba and I wait another round before getting on.

After multiple "whys" from Bubba on why it was taking so long I finally whispered in his ear, "Because people keep cutting in line which we do not do." I later regretted this because in one of the lines while I wasn't paying attention I think Bubba said something about line etiquette to one of the other daddies that was conveniently tattooed up with his "805" gang affiliations and seemed to have his entire posse with him in line. He laughed then looked up at me not laughing, to which I responded with a sheepish grin and shrugged my shoulders in a effort to say, "What-can-you-do-please-don't-stab-me."

If the line-cutting wasn't bad enough at least one mother (note never a father) in every line had a 60 second debate with the ride operator on one of two issues (60 seconds is a very long time by the way when you are going to make it on this ride but at any moment 15 relatives may show up and get on meaning you don't). She was either in disbelief that her 14 month old was not able to ride by himself (though there were dozens of posters and measuring signs clearing displaying you had to be at least 32" tall to ride) or she was irate that her child that was 32" tall could not ride alone and she had to buy a ticket for herself to ride with him (which was also posted clearly at every ride).

What I realized after about the third let-my-kid-on or I-don't-have-a-ticket debate was each mom knew the rules. I again had an in-my-head-tirade similar to the one above. During one very eloquent speech Bubba asked me, "Dada, you talkin' to yourself?". To which I responded "Yes" because I was apparently silently mouthing my tirade while staring at the mother hoping she would somehow hear my disdain through some sort of supernatural-pissed-off-dad-mind-meld. No dice though.

The ironic part of this experience was on about half the rides the ride operator stopped me on the way out to award me with a VIP ticket for a free ride. I think it was because I made Bubba say "Thank You" after each ride, but I also think it may be because I accidentally mind-melded with them instead of the aimed at mom so to make up for my suffering gave me a free ride in order that I could suffer the entire ordeal over again...

I had so many tickets left over I was able to award three girls with 9 ride tickets to which they very politely said, "Thank You". As I walked away I heard their squeals of joy as they told their friends they just got a bunch of free tickets, which made the night out with Bubba ever better.

They Call Me "The Baby Whisperer"

2008-04-26T15:52:00.000-07:00

Wanna win the cry war? Either call me because I'm a freakin' pro at this or watch this 7 minute video (do not call me by the way...my baby soothing schedule is all full up). All I can say is thank you Dr. Karp for making The Happiest Baby on the Block.Dads this is especially for you because I think this is easier for us as we have longer forearms and bigger hands. Sorry if you are of the vertically challenged or just have freakishly short arms and stubby fingers because you're probably screwed here and on the basketball court...bummer.

After mastering this technique with Sweet Pea I now wonder why in name of sleep deprivation did I not watch this video when Bubba was born? I promise if you do this right you will get more sleep and you will be a stud-man-awesome-husband-gentle-father all at the same time in the eyes of your wife. And that combo is a rarity.

If you are thinking I already know "the 5 S's" so I don't have to watch this, do it anyway. I knew them before with Bubba but I was doing it wrong. Swinging is not really swinging, but rather jiggling..."the 5 =S's" just sounds better than "the 4 S's and 1 J".

As a word of caution here do not "shake" your baby. Shaking babies is bad.

Martini + Shaken = Good
Baby + Shaken = Someone should punch you in the nuts

Now go out and make some happy babies. After all, happy babies means happy mommies and happy mommies means you might actually get some in another 3 to 4 weeks...

Conversations Only of the Parental Type

2008-04-26T15:09:00.001-07:00

We had bigs plans for the Santa Barbara Fair today. We left the house approximately one hour after our rendezvous time with friends at the fair. From the outside of Dora (our Explorer's name. Dora the Ford...get it? What? You don't name your cars?) it appeared as though we were going to run a marathon while pushing three kids.

toddler bag - check
diaper bag - check
single jogger - check
double jogger - check
kiddopotamus - check
Baby Bjorn (in case Sweet Pea didn't like the jogger): check
The Ultimate Wrap (in case Sweet Pea didn't like jogger or Baby Bjorn) - check
three Nalgene bottles - check
Bubba - check
Sweet Pea - check

It really does take longer to get out of the house with two kids...

On the way to the fair we were listening to VeggieTales Sing-Alongs: O Veggie, Where Art Thou. Bubba's favorite song is Old Time Religion. MyLove's is Amazing Grace, and when it came on she turned the volume way up so she could hear the end solo part. And then we had this conversation...
MyLove: Isn't that solo part at the end by the asparagus great!
Me: I don't think that's the asparagus. It's Grandpa Bob.
MyLove: No way, it's the asparagus. Listen closer.
Me: (listening)
MyLove: It's the asparagus. (she at this point sings the part like and with said asparagus having very pronounced arm motions like she is the lead in a Broadway show)
Me: Yeah..maybe it is.

In my head I'm thinking this has to be the most ridiculous debate that has ever taken place on the face of God's Green Earth.

Please tell me that you have these conversations, too.

Poo and Christian Music

2008-04-25T22:16:00.000-07:00

In no way am I running out of This and Thats, but I just read a great one on Ross King's blog here.

"Public Announcement" - Go Download It NOW!

2008-04-25T11:43:00.001-07:00

My Lover and I love our Church. We feel supremely blessed that we have the most amazing worship leader of any Church I/we have been to. I have been in too many congregations where no one was singing but the band on stage, and I think, "How is this worshiping together?"

I think it is rare to find a worship leader that is a professional performer and also "leads worship" versus performs. As a worship leader and performer Dominic Balli is a gifted musician and has just released his first full length album - Public Announcement.

Dominic is a daddy to daughter Selah and son Solomon (awesome names). But before Solomon was born Emily (Dominic's wife) miscarried twins. I can't imagine the pain associated with a loss like this, but Dominic shows a glimpse of his feelings on the track Babies - one of my favorite songs.

If you are looking for some unique Christian music with really great lyrics go download Public Announcement. You can also download it on iTunes.Here is a snipit of a review of Public Announcement and Babies. Read the full review here.

"Lastly, is an emotional song written about Dominic and Emily's recent miscarriage. These are touching lyrics that are sure to resonate with anyone who has ever lost a loved one. And just when you think the album is done there is a ghost track that is well worth the wait!

I am going to be totally honest with you. I have two of the most critical ears of anyone that I know in the industry. I rarely endure the first song (in its entirety) on any album that is sent to me. It is even harder for me to listen down an album from beginning to the end without pressing that magical ">>" button whenever I hear something that makes me cringe. This may have been the first album that I didn't skip forward on since Bob Marley's "Exodus." This CD is incredible! Since I received it I have listened to it over and over again at work, at home and in the car.

I am convinced that this album has the greatest crossover potential of any album sold on GospelReggae.com. Dominic is an incredible worship leader at his home church (Reality Carpenteria) and an awesome husband and father with a burning passion for his Lord. Having known him for the last few years I am confident that when he does crossover, (and he will) he will take the CROSS-over with him."

Poopie Brownies!

2008-04-25T09:00:00.001-07:00

My Lover's funny mother sent me this parenting story today. I'm sure it's been around a while, but it is worth sharing.

When a simple ,'No' just doesn't suffice here is a wonderful reply for all of the children in our lives.

BROWNIE RECIPE
A father of some teenage children had the family rule that they could not attend PG-13, R or X rated movies. His three teens wanted to see a particular popular movie that was playing at local theaters. It was rated PG-13.

The teens interviewed friends and even some members of their family's church to find out what was offensive in the movie. The teens made a list of pros and cons about the movie to use to convince their dad that they should be allowed to see it.

The cons were:

It contained ONLY 3 swear words!
The ONLY violence was a building exploding (and you see that on TV all the time they said),
You actually did not 'see' the couple in the movie having sex, it was just implied sex, off camera.

The pros were:

It was a popular movie, (a blockbuster).
Everyone was seeing it.
If the teens saw the movie then they would not feel left out when their friends discussed it.
The movie contained a good story and plot.
It had some great adventure and suspense in it.
There were some fantastic special effects in this movie.
The movie's stars were some of the most talented actors in Hollywood.
It probably would be nominated for several awards.
Many members of their Christian church, including the pastor, had even seen the movie and said it wasn't really 'that bad'.

Therefore, since there were more pros than cons the teens asked their father to reconsider his position on just this ONE movie and let them have permission to go see it.

The father looked at the list and thought for a few minutes. He said he could tell his children had spent some time and thought on this request. He asked if he could have a day to think about it before making his decision.

The teens were thrilled, thinking, 'Now we've got him! Our argument is too good! Dad can't turn us down!' So, they happily agreed to let him have a day to think about their request.

The next evening the Father called his three teenagers, who were smiling smugly, into the living room. There on the coffee table he had a plate of brownies. The teens were puzzled. The father told his children he had thought about their request and had decided that if they would eat the brownies, then he would let them go to the movie. But, he explained, just like the movie, the brownies had pros and cons.

The pros were :

They were made with the finest chocolate and other good ingredients.
They had the added special effect of yummy walnuts in them.
The brownies were moist and fresh with wonderful chocolate frosting on top.
He had made these fantastic brownies using an award-winning recipe.
And best of all, the brownies had been made lovingly by the hand of their own father.

The brownies only had one con :

He had included a little bit of a special ingredient: The brownies contained just a small amount of dog poop.

But he had mixed the dough well and they probably would not even be able to taste the dog poop and he had baked it at 350 degrees so hopefully any bacteria or germs from the dog poop had probably been destroyed. Therefore, if any of his children could stand to eat the brownies which included just a 'little bit of crap' and not be affected by it, then he knew they would also be able to see the movie with 'just a little bit of smut' and not be affected.

Of course, none of the teens would eat the brownies and the smug smiles had left their faces. Now when his teenagers ask permission to do something he KNOWS THEY SHOULDN'T BE DOING the father just asks, 'Would you like me to whip up a batch of my special brownies?

Hey Guys Look At Me!

2008-04-24T21:05:00.000-07:00

Do you ever wonder what goes on inside the head of a three year old? I constantly wonder.

How does a 3 year brain work that it would know putting an oven mitt on one foot and dad's shoe on the other would be funny? And then to top it off with a red foam bat for good measure. He knew it was funny because he walked outside and said, "Hey guys, look at me!"

How do they know?!

Walt Disney and Dead Cats

2008-04-22T09:57:00.000-07:00

As dinner wound down a couple nights ago Bubba and I were sitting at the table together talking about life. My Lover was changing Sweet Pea's diaper in the other room so it was man-to-man talk. We talked about cars, airplanes, going to the zoo, and other things that happened to Bubba that day. The conversation then took an odd turn.

Bubba: Dada, I'm gonna kill the cat and put it in a box.
Me: WHAT!? (attempting not not laugh)
Bubba: I'm gonna kill the cat and put it in a box.
Me: Your going to kill Bowen? (our cat's name is Bowen)
Bubba: Yes.
Me: Why?
Bubba: Because I like to.

At this point I was thinking maybe I need to show a little more affection toward Bowen. I'm not a huge cat fan (he was part of the package when My Lover and I got married), and have probably said a few times with gritted teeth when he does stuff I don't like, "I'm gonna kill that cat." I thought maybe I had turned our loving 3 year old into an estranged cat killer. But I was hoping something else was maybe happening here...

As a side note "Because I like to." has become a very common answer when asking Brody why he did something wrong and he is not sure how to respond.

Me: But why would you kill Bowen?
Brody: Dada! (with arms out streched a palms up) Like the guy on Scamp.
Me: You mean like the dog catcher does with Scamp?
Brody: Yes.
Me: Bubba, do you mean you are going to catch the cat and put it in the pound like the dog catcher does with Scamp.
Brody: Yeah dadda, like that.

So there you have it. Walt Disney made my toddler want to kill our cat and put him in a box.

Lady and the Tramp II is a really cute
movie and great for toddler ages.

Scamp (aka Whirlwind) = Bubba

Farts and Frogs

2008-04-20T17:19:00.000-07:00

Everybody always has their word for flatulence: pass gas, fart, fluff, toot, break wind, body burp, break a cookie, step on a duck, cut the cheese, the lonely cry of an imprisoned turd. So the challenge is what to call it around your toddler so that when he (or she I suppose) says it around the non-familial type nobody takes major offense. If he says (or does) something the worst you want is surprised and the best reaction is when it's kinda cute. I wonder what the age is when farting in public is no longer cute and becomes rude? Anyone know of a study done on this subject? I'd be interested in the results... For the record, for boys it is always funny...always. And that goes for boys of any age. Farting to boys is funny, period!

Around this house we refer to them as "toots". It seems to be the most harmless and toot is kind of a cute word. It makes you think of the sound a toy train or something. For the record a lot of tooting goes on at our house, mostly to the credit of me and Brody. Now before you get all grossed out or affronted at a affluence flatulence, go read The Gas We Pass. Then read Everybody Poops. When you are completely educated on the subject you can look at it from an objective scientific point of view...like me. Besides if you teach them to just hold it in and be embarrassed by it that leads to all sorts insecurities...I'm sure there are studies.

Sometimes when I'm with Bubba he'll say, "Dada you tooted." A few times I've said, "No, but I think I may have just sat on a frog!" He laughs which makes me laugh and we both think farting is funny...see previous point. Well the other day Bubba and I were playing in his room and he let loose a pretty good growler. Totally straight faced he looks at me and says, "Kevin, I think I have a frog in my butt." Seriously...first name and all! I need to have a video recorder on this kid 24/7 because I know that very soon those tiny communication misses will be gone. 3 is such a wonderful age!

we love craigslist.com

2008-04-18T16:37:00.000-07:00

Of all the kids toys we have I think only about 70% of it we bought new. 30% of it we bought on Craigslist. Chrystal also frequents garage sales, but to me that is a whip.

We love Craigslist. Whether it be for strollers, toys, cribs, dressers, baby backpacks or computers we love it. In the last 12 months we've probably bought $6000 or $7000 of stuff off of Craigslist, and saved at least $2000 in doing so. We bought Brody's crib (a Pali Paula that retailed for $700 at the time) for $200 and then recently sold it for $185 three years later. We bought Mianna's crib (a Pali that retails for $500) for $100 a few months ago. We bought it from a grandma that used it less than 15 times for her visiting grandchildren. We also bought her dresser from the grandaughter - a hand made dresser changing table combo for $40.

If you need something, try Craigslist first. It's better than ebay because you can see exactly what you are getting before you buy. And it's a great place to sell stuff, too.

Baseball and Bad Guys

2008-04-18T00:23:00.001-07:00

Bubba recently turned 3 and has been a bit more interested in "playing". He now regularly asks me, "Dada, you want to play with me?" My answer to this question is always "Yes", but as I work from home I often have to tell him we'll play after nap or a little later. This afternoon I asked him if he wanted to play catch in the front yard. I think 3 is a pretty good age to learn to catch a baseball (I think that's probably when my dad started with me). Here was our conversation.

Me: Bubba you want to play catch?
Bubba: Sure! (I love when he answers this way)
Me: Okay, you go get your glove and I'll go get mine.
Bubba: No dada, you come get mine with me.
Me: Okay.

We go to his room to get his glove and start walking down the stairs.

Bubba: Dada, you be the bad guy?
Me: Be the what?
Bubba: You be the bad guy?
Me: Bubba, there are no bad guys in baseball.
Bubba: Dada, you be the bad guy and I'll be the little guy.
Me: Okay?

We go outside to play catch. To my surprise and delight Bubba put his glove on the right hand (which is his right hand) and then proceeds to throw me the ball. He looks right at me with his "serious face" and says, "Dada, I'm the bad guy." He takes an over exaggerated wind up with a high pitcher's leg kick and throws (at 3 and approximately 3 feet this is always fun to watch). However, the ball nor his hand ever leaves the glove. His glove and throw hand stays with his follow-threw and he sort of just plops his glove and ball on the ground. Then with a sort of slow motion 360 twist around he pretends to fall down from dizziness and lays down on the sidewalk. He then looks up at me with a dirt smudge now on his cheek from the ground and says, "I was the bad guy."

And then it hit me. It was his over exaggerated throw that gave him away...

He was mimicking Lefty, the less than honest pitcher for the Chicago Cub's that steals Darlin, Babe Ruth's bat in order to win the World Series in the must see animated movie "Everyone's Hero". Lefty is the "bad guy" and Yankee Irving, the young hero that takes on a quest to steal Darlin back is the "little guy". Seriously this kid amazes me. He sucks up information and remembers things that just blow my mind.

Apparently there are bad guys in baseball...who knew?

Lefty (aka Bad Guy)

Yankee (aka "Little Guy")

Great Days of Our Lives

2008-04-13T14:28:00.000-07:00

There are many beautiful places to live in this world. I've had the pleasure of living in at least two (here and here). I've visited some beautiful places for vacation. But I think you would be hard pressed to live (or visit) a more beautiful or wonderful place than Santa Barbara.

Bubba and I needed some quality Dada-Bubba time since I was at the hospital with My Lover for almost four days for Sweet Pea's entrance. So yesterday Brody and I went to the tide pools in Carpinteria with Erin (Brody's girlfriend) and her dad Jono to enjoy the wondrous 80 degree weather. Bubba and Erin got to hold starfish and sea snails, touch sea anemones, swim in little pools of warm water, and experience rubbing off tar with smooth rocks provided by the ocean. I thought this huge starfish was the coolest!

Bubba and Erin wading in the pools holding a HUGE starfish. Bubba wouldn't touch hold it,
but Erin is very adventurous and will touch just about anything!

Erin really was having the best time! My Lover and I are pretty sure Erin will be a model...
and probably a pretty good athlete based on her genetics.

I tried to get Bubba to hold this sea anemone (it was dead) but politely said, "No thank you."
Erin however was all to anxious to try holding it.

Note that we were not at an amusement park. We did not pay money to see some staged environment mimicking nature. We did not travel to a remote location to experience the wonders of God's creation. We drove down the street, walked down the beach, and WHAM! were in the middle of a three year old's dream world. We had so much fun together (aside from the tar) and built for me what will be life long memories of Bubba's ~~first~~ second (My Lover corrected me on this) experience to the tide pools.

After we got home we got to enjoy a wonderful veggie lasagna dinner provided by one of our Bible study members (thanks Anna!) on our patio. Grandmama and Georgina convinced me to bust out the fire pit and have a marshmallow roast on Grandmama's last day with us.

Bubba loved to burn the marshmallow and then try and blow it out. After lighting this
specific marshmallow and it getting slightly out of control he dropped the roasting
stick and ran into the yard. Too funny!

Bubba thought the melted marshmallow was pretty good on his fingers.

Bubba turning 3 has had its challenges, but man do I love his little boy antics. He had the best time blowing out on-fire marshmallows and just being with all of us. Oh, and it was like 65 degrees with a wonderful starry sky.

Yesterday was one of the great days of my life. That was two great days in one week so I'm feeling pretty blessed.

After you read this post go out and make some great days of your own with your kids.

Ending the Name Game

2008-04-09T21:54:00.000-07:00

With the pressure mounting we have finally decided on a name! If you don't decide before you leave the hospital they told me you will get buried in the paperwork that normally the hospital fills out. After today I can attest that playing the name game is not as enjoyable after the birth. The pressure really builds and you start to make spreadsheets that cross-correlate first and middle names to come up with the perfect name. You write each name out and compare how they look and sound. And then you try to come up with all the reasons that it isn't a good name. It really is horribly stressful. And we had a name by the way. We had a name that we liked and that Chrystal had picked out like 20 years ago. But when we met baby sister the name just did not seem to fit. We still really like that name, but we know now her name fits her. And it's important for a name to fit. After all people change their names if they don't fit when they become adults...I wonder how their parents feel about that?

The process was also funny as we got the whole of friends and family providing recommendations. Here is our list of unsolicited suggestions. ;-)

Serious Suggestions
Eden
Ava
Aria
Jo
Abigail
Kaitlyn
Brenda
Beatrice
Lindsay
Lisa
Cassandra
Sister
Pauline
Champagne
Cinderella

Maybe? Serious Suggestions
Sweet Pea
Olive Oyl
Wimpy
Jonne Beach (from uncle Jonathon Beach Mathis)
Dorkus (Biblical apparently)
Boo (like on Monsters, Inc.)
Scratches (Brody's personal favorite)

The "Rhyming Names"
Marmaderm Sturm (my favorite submitted by Papa Joe)
Burn Sturm
Sharlum Sturm
Rowandurm Sturm

Can y'all tell I'm stalling...oh the anticipation!

Introducing (drum roll please)....

Mianna Leta Marie Sturm

Mianna - (me-ah-naa) We really felt like she looked like a Mia and fell in love with Mianna. There are a few meanings here. We really wanted to have her name incorporate Great Grandma's name Anna Maria. Mia is short for Maria so we switched them and created Mianna. In my previous post I asked "What's in a name?" and we liked the meanings of this name. Mia being short for Maria is a Hebrew name meaning "Wished for Child" and Anna is a Hebrew name meaning "Grace of God". We love that Mianna is our Wished for Child provided by the Grace of God.

Leta - (lee-taa) Leta Rue was Chrystal's other grandma. She was a wonderful woman. Leta is a Latin name meaning "Glad".

Marie - (ma-rie) Marie is Chrystal's middle name and is also a derivative of Maria. Again a Hebrew name meaning "Wished for Child"

Thank you all for your well wishes, kind comments, and funny responses. We feel very well loved.

What's In a Name...

2008-04-07T22:43:00.000-07:00

My life is better today than it was yesterday...It was dark when we got up yesterday morning at O-dark-30. After going through the normal morning routine (shower, teeth brush, etc.) Chrystal and I headed to the hospital for a 6:45 am appointment in the labor and delivery ward. Our arrival was somewhat uneventful as the nurse noted we were "right on time".

We got to hang out and watch a slide show of Brody (which created some water works) and have an overall relaxing wait. We had to make Chrystal's "birthing goals", which may have been a bit lofty but you gotta aim high.
I went down and got some breakfast and a cup of coffee at about 8:20. By the way, hospital food is crazy cheap so we are going to come here more often for date night!

At about 9:15 AM Chrystal went into the OR. I have to say being present while your wife has what really is a pretty major surgery (though routine) while she is awake is a surreal experience. From TV shows you kinda think the OR is a serious place with calm music and quiet concentration. But there were 9 people in the room I think, not including the parents (us). The anesthesiologist, Dr. Mac was on his cell phone with another doctor. (Chrystal openly announced to me and her mom Dr. Mac was gorgeous. We found out the nurses call him Dr. Macaroon. Hilarious! She also crushed her past anesthesiologist from when Brody was born. Apparently to be an anesthesiologist at Cottage Hospital a pre-req is to make all the dads feel inferior.) The two doctors performing the surgery were casually talking about their kids having the flu. Two nurses were looking at charts, while another two nurses were engrossed in some conversation I could not hear. And a doctor in training was just observing the surgery. I kinda wanted to clap twice and yell, "Pay attention people, this is serious stuff!" But they seemed to know what they were doing so I saved my tirade for another day. And I didn't want anyone to accidentally drop an organ or something...

At 9:51 AM "baby sister" was pulled out of a 6 inch incision on mama's tummy with an amount of force that really catches you off guard. One doctor reached in through the incision while another pulled and pushed on her belly. They both then prepped the room with "Ready!?" and all the room went silent with a "This is now serious!" look. The doctor then grabbed Baby Sister and yanked her out, again with an amount of force which I was sure would make Chrystal slide right off the table on the floor with a "thump". But they really do seem to know what they are doing and Chrystal was apparently strapped down pretty tight.

The process is amazing really. If you have experienced the whole pregnancy and birth process but don't believe in God then I don't get you...it is the most amazing miracle of creation. But today and for the rest of my days my life is better because I got to be a daddy again. Baby Sister is the most beautiful baby girl. She is precious and sweet and so soft you want to dip her in honey and eat her (parents will get that statement, parentless will think me oddly cannibalistic). But God blessed us with a wonderful health baby girl, which is all we could ask for. Here are her stats...(yes I know they spelled our name wrong...and that is pretty normal actually)But at this point we are 24 hours into it and still do not have peace about this little sweet pea's name. I know what you're thinking, you've had 10 months to figure this out...and you're right. But she will have to live with a name her entire life, so it needs to be good and it needs to fit. We'll know soon, but either way it is my pleasure to introduce you to "Baby Sister" Sturm. I know...you don't even have to say it...she's gorgeous!

On Feeling Like an Adult

2008-03-22T23:16:00.000-07:00

I think the most direct way to feel like/become an adult is to have a kid. A close second however is to have your "little sister" have her second kid! On Thursday, March 13th my niece Briella Joy was welcomed into this world.Chrystal and I are so excited because Briella and "baby girl Sturm" will be so close together! Watching our family grow is really one of the things I love most about getting older...though I'm still very young!

Post Christmas Photos

2007-12-26T20:30:00.000-08:00

The Sturm household was definitely decked for Christmas this year. We had a Christmas tree in every room, with a total of 6 trees. One full size and 5 miniatures.
It was a lot of fun because Brody really got into opening presents this year. Most of the time before he even saw what was in the box he would say, "Oooooh wooooow, I love it!" He got a new big wheel called the Twist Trike which I highly recommend. It changes from trike to big wheel quickly and easily. Brody absolutely loves it and cruises up and down the side walk. He also got a new drum set which is really fun. We haven't moved it into his room yet, but we'll see what happens when we do.

My awesome wife got me a guitar for Christmas. I've told her through dating and marriage that I wish I knew how to play guitar, so she bought one to encourage me to really do it. She is my biggest encourager and supporter.

Eyes of a Child

2007-12-23T13:23:00.000-08:00

We live in an older neighborhood in Santa Barbara and we love it. But, for whatever reason many of our neighbors don't seem to have a problem with littering. I'm constantly picking up trash around our house, street, and neighborhood.

Just before it got dark yesterday Brody and I went to our neighborhood park about two blocks away. I was so irritated when we got there because there were bottles, cups, and cans around the park. There are 3 trash and recycle cans within 100 feet of the park in every direction. As I was pushing Brody on the swing I picked up some of the trash between pushes. I then had this conversation.

Brody: "What you doin' dada?"
Me: "Pickin' up trash Bubba. It makes me sad when people litter."
Brody: "There's a cup dada! And there! And another one!"
Me: "I know Brody, but some of those cups are covered in gross and I don't have a bag for them."
Brody: "Okay dada"
Brody: "I want to swing faster dada." (which means higher)
Me: "Okay, hold on tight." (Brody is now swinging as high as I dare push him)
Brody: Looking up at the sky as he swings, "Dada it's real beautiful out here!"
Me: "It is?"
Brody: "Yeah! The wind makes my breath feel better. Take a real deep breath, Dada!"

As I took a deep breath I looked up and noticed the pink sunset Brody saw as he swung forward and looked at the sky. I then realized that Brody didn't see the trash on the playground. He saw swings, sand, slides, and things to climb on. He was there with daddy, there was a cool wind on his face from swinging, and the sky was a pretty color. What could be better. My irritation melted away as this 2 year old taught me that you can either see trash or beauty.

It is easy to see trash when that is your focus. Brody taught me that it's easy to see beauty when that is your focus.

Brody's view of the sky.

Jammies Party!

2007-12-21T22:24:00.000-08:00

Chrystal had this great idea to have a kids jammies party for Christmas. We invited a bunch of kids (and their parents) over to decorate cookies, do a craft, and have some food. The caveat was you had to come dressed in your jammies. All the kids got to eat Candy Canes and cookies before dinner, which went over well. We had four 2 year olds, a 5 year old, and a 5 month old. Lot's of chaos and great fun! Brody was bouncing off the walls at 9:00 pm, so he had fun, too!

Thanks sweetie for being such a great mommy and so creative. And thanks to all our friends that came over."I am crazy plate head boy, gimme some candy!"

"My hand tastes like cookies! Wanna lick!""If you knew I was going to jump from here, you wouldn't be sitting there holding that camera."
"Chug, chug, chug! Quick before they realize this has sugar in it, too."

Somebody Stole Baby Jesus!

2007-12-04T23:43:00.000-08:00

We took Brody to the Santa Barbara Mission to see the Nativity yesterday. I was disappointed, though not surprised, to find that someone had stolen baby Jesus from the manger. Brody was pretty disappointed as well, which was really cute. "Somebody took baby Jesus?", he kept asking.
I can't help but make an analogy to how society in general has taken Jesus out of Christmas, just like some sad person stole baby Jesus out of the manger. He is the Reason for the Season!

Take a Chance...Be Outlandish!

2007-11-04T06:30:00.000-08:00

My little sister turned 30 on October 31st (which makes me feel old). To celebrate she had a big costume party yesterday with friends and family. We drove to Phoenix on Thursday for the party and were really excited about our costumes (or at least my costume). Brody was a Nascar driver for Halloween (because he loves Cars), so Chrystal and I decided we had to build our costume around his.

This was the first costume party I'd been to in like 10 years, but leading up to a costume party I'm always thinking that my costume is dumb or that my personality is too reserved to make anything too funny work. But just like in business you can't get a payoff without taking a chance and risking. And with costume parties it can mean putting your own comfort level at aside, just like it can with business. Here are some of my favorites costumes that required people to take a risk.

Peter Pan Gone Wrong: Tammy (my sister) as pregnant Wendy, Jon (brother-in-law) as washed up daddy-to-be Peter Pan, and Malena (niece) as Tinkerbell.
Bugsy and Trixie - My parents as gangsters
Ulysses(U.) Daman: Andy as a former junior high basketball phenom who now lives at the YMCA in Harlem. Always ready for a game! And this really didn't require Andy to move out of his comfort zone...this is pretty much how he is.
Magnum PI: Mark showing some skin
He shaved his beard and glued it to his chest to sport the signature chest hair. It was all spotty and kept falling off.
Lightening McQueen Fan Club: Lighteing McQueen (Brody), McQueen's pit crew (Chrystal), crazy trailer park trash fan (me).
The short shorts boys
I had a ton of fun because a bunch of people didn't know who I was. My parents came back from getting ready at the neighbors house when I was in the garage. I was bending down behind the car looking for something and when I stood up they had no idea who I was. My dad's first thought was, "This guy looks crazy and am I going to have to take him out." And yes I am holding a 24oz Old English '800'. I tried to drink it but it was so gross I dumped it out and filled it with apple juice. It was funny though because everyone thought I was really drinking Old English. I even went and found some beef jerky chew (had to go to three stores) so it really looked like I had tobacco in my lip (but it ended up burning my gums which was a bummer side effect). Oh, and the mustache is totally real!
And I won most popular costume and got a $25 Starbucks card. So take a chance and be outlandish...you never know.

Family Matters

2007-09-10T21:02:00.000-07:00

When it comes to family matters, family matters. It's easy to get caught up in work stress, traffic, to-do lists, bills, money, and the stuff in life that keeps you from enjoying life. This week has been such a blessing. I've the had the opportunity to work remotely from my parents place in Phoenix and I have had such a great time. Having the freedom to schedule my day as I want to spend it, still work a full day, and see Brody a lot more really has me looking forward to having a home based business. Four weeks and counting!

On Sunday I bought an underwater camera for eight bucks and got the film developed for five bucks. Check out the pictures of Brody and family swimming! For 13 bucks I'd say that is an awesome deal! I'm so impressed by this 2 year old Aqua Man!

Check him out...totally under water and loving it!

He gets the biggest grin on his face every time he goes under. Holds his breath and everything!

Brody with cousin Nicole.

Brody and cousin Greg. This is one of my favorite shots!

He loved all the bubbles right after he would jump in!

Me and my buddy.

Taking a shower (as Brody called it).

Brody, Malena, and MorMor (Grandma for those non Swedes).

Proud Daddy

2007-09-08T23:58:00.000-07:00

We're at my folks house in Phoenix for the weekend and since it's blazin' hot we go swimming twice a day. Brody discovered today he could hold his breath under water and that when he kicked his feet he would come to the surface. It really freaked me out at first, but under water he has his eyes open and a big smile on his face. I was so proud of him!

Five Years of Wonderful

2007-07-28T14:38:00.000-07:00

Five years ago yesterday I married my best friend!

For our five year anniversary I surprised MyLove with a trip to Santa Ynez. We stayed in a quaint B&B called Meadowlark Inn and went wine tasting for the first time. Both of us thought it crazy that we have lived in Santa Barbara so long and never gone wine tasting.

When we arrived I was a bit disappointed because the B&B was not what I expected. I was expecting something a bit nicer, but the old adage “don’t judge a book by it’s cover” definitely applied. Upon arriving, the inn keeper welcomed us by name and was so friendly we immediately felt at home. We stayed in the Cabernet suite, which has a funny hot tub on the patio (check out the video). There was a mix up with our wine tour schedule where I thought it was Saturday, but it was Friday. The tour started at 11:00 but we were not able to get there till about 1:30. The staff was super accommodating, and adjusted our wine tour to start at 2:00 by picking us up half way through the tour and then took just the two of us for another two hours to complete the tour.

The best part about the tour is that the inn owner does the tour personally. We were told that she was a former restaurant owner, so she new all of the places to go that had great wine versus just popular wineries. To our delight, our tour guide was Brigitte (pronounced bri-gee-ta) of Brigitte’s restaurant fame in Santa Barbara (now Opal). We heard wonderful stories of her move to the United States from Germany and how she has been involved in starting multiple restaurants in Santa Barbara (Brigitte's, Downey’s, and Norbert's).

My favorite tasting room was Artiste, which is a tasting room and art gallery. The featured artist’s medium was wine! MyLove and I both thought it was so interesting. All the wine labels are featured artists, and the name of that wine is the name of the painting.

At the last winery which was my favorite, Rusack, we just sipped wine and talked with Brigitte about the restaurant industry. The winery manager finally had to come and kick us out because they were closing.

What really made our stay, other than it being with my best friend, was that we were treated like family. It is not the nicest B&B I have stayed at, but it is definitely my favorite experience at any B&B. Brigitte and her staff staged a great experience that we will forever correlate with wonderful memories. As a business owner Brigitte really understands that hospitality is about staging a memorable experience for the guest.

We definitely plan on doing future wine tours with Brigitte, and hopefully she will be a future client of kevin sturm Consulting as she is going to open a restaurant at her other B&B Story Book Inn.

If you would like to contact Brigitte directly to inquire about a customized wine tour you can reach her at info@meadowlarkinnsolvang.com.

Life Changes...

2006-05-26T00:30:00.000-07:00

Just when you begin to feel comfortable, life seems to want to change all at once. I've spent some time over the past couple months reviewing changes in my life, and it makes me question where these changes will ultimately lead. I'm not intending to sound deep, it just makes me think about life decisions. I don't believe these changes or my life are any more or less significant than anyone elses, but they seem to be extra significant right now.

My son turned one year old last month...which is bigger than you think for a parent
Two months ago I was informed I was being removed from the job I held for four years (and that I liked)
I was then offered a new job with the same company...and accepted it
One month later I rejected the job offer (this last Friday) and accepted a different job in the same company
My little sister had a baby (obviously she is not so little anymore) which is hard to believe
Found out two days ago that my dad has cancer

All of these changes affect me and my family in different ways: some good, some bad - but they have an affect. I think the biggest thing these changes have made me reflect on is the reliance on Christ that I am forced to have. I am a "make my own way" type of person, but that isn't God's plan. Daily I have to recognize that my life is not my own, but the choices that I make and how I chose to let changes in my life affect me are. My friend Matt Richter put it well when he summarized an evening Bible study with, "We are to pursue righteousness in our choices." Our choices should be focused around the eternal, rather than the immediate grafication of our own desires.

I know that life will continue to bring changes - which lead to choices. I hope that I can accutely listen for Christ and make the right choice.

This Daddy

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This daddy is a self proclaimed Next Generation Dad. But when you make up the phrase you can self proclaim just about anything. I have also just proclaimed myself King of Daddyland, which makes MamaLita royalty, Bubba a prince, and Mimi a princess. Just like in a Disney movie!

On that note I probably should buy Disney stock because I'm pretty confident I am single handedly increasing the stock value, and we haven't even made the trip to the most-crowded-overpriced-ensuring-it-under-delivers-on-most-parent's-expectations-place-on-Earth.

Now you are probably asking yourself what is an NGD?

An NGD is a dad that believes, and daily lives out, that raising kids is an equal partnership and joint effort between a mom and dad — with a reasonable exception for birthing and breast feeding. Next Generation Dads know raising the next generation of men and women is the most important, rewarding, and life changing job you could be offered, even though you are usually under qualified, often ill prepared, and generally over confident (it may just be me that was over confident, but I think over confidence is more common to dads than moms).

To do it really well means dedicating the greatest percentage of your time, energy, and life to the task.

Being a husband and a dad was the one thing I always knew I wanted. I had plans on what I would do for a "job" (which ultimately turned out very different than the plan). But having a family was a constant. I think this desire was because of the family life I had growing up. I thought it was normal to have your parents really love each other, to have both sets of grandparents spend holidays together, and to think divorce was weird.

Thanks to the "job" I didn't plan to have I met MamaLita in Dallas, TX. Three years later Bubba joined the troop and three years after that Mimi arrived.

I am a very proud, occasionally frustrated, often tired, and extremely passionate daddy. I love my kids and can't wait to have more. As a side note we will adopt all future siblings, something MamaLita and I are passionate about. There are too many tikes in this world without parents to love, hug, and kiss on (I always just want to eat mine...seriously); and being a daddy means more than just having someone who has half my chromosomal anomalies (poor Bubba).

After Bubba and before Mimi I quit my "job" and got a life. I still have job, but now I refer to myself as a Lifestyle Entrepeneur. The freedom to work from home and work when and how I want means I get to spend loads of time being a daddy. The hardest part is trying to explain to Bubba why I can't, "Play with me!" when I am working. We are not getting rich by the world's standards, but I am getting rich based on the NGD standard. I can honestly say I love what I do, which is rare I think.

If you are a Cubicle-Cave-Dweller or C-Level-Lifer and want to make the leap to Lifestyle Entrepreneur I highly recommend it. You can go here, here, here, here ,and here for some encouragement and real life help on how.

So, in addition to being a daddy I am an entrepreneur, regular blogger, public speaker, information sharer, avid reader, TV watcher (too much probably), average athlete, lover of life and people, and pursuer of a relationship with Jesus (the Christ one not the Mexican down the street). I think it is important to do well in life, but know it is much more important to do good! I know that God has blessed me richly, and desire to share those blessings.

I am a technology evangelist and love that technology will continue to change the world at a increasing pace. I love gadgets, and if you meet me it is apparent based on the slew of them in my laptop bag. But, I also believe the need for technology and immediate information has created a modern society where self introspection and time for quite thought is of less importance than it should be. New and good ideas are generated from taking time to notice the world around us, and then thinking clearly in order to discuss and take action on ways to improve it - both technically and socially.

Aside from spending time with my family, friends, and business I am passionate about the concept and reality of social entrepreneurship and micro-finance lending. I have been blessed with love, success, confidence, and the opportunity to access almost every convenience in life. My goal is in turn to help others have access to these same blessings. Over half the world's population live in extreme poverty earning less than $2.00 a day. My generation, our generation, is the first to be able to say we can realistically see the end to extreme poverty. I can think of no greater calling to use our resources to spread God's love and help to serve those in need.

You can check out my company here and here, more about my thoughts on business life here., and MamaLita's blog here.

If you would like to contribute a guest post to NGD or just ask me questions email me.

If you read this whole thing I'm impressed and hope that you like some of my ramblings on daddy-hood.

Whose Daddy?

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Bubba (age 3)Click here for the story of Bubba.

SweetPea (under 1)Click here for the story of SweetPea

Photos taken by Halberg Photographers.